To all my fellas out there looking to take there lady to that special place next week for Valentines Day...here are my recommendations for you.
1. Morley's fried chicken - if your girl wears these (click), or these (click) and keeps her hair underneath a hat like this (click), then my friend Morleys is the place you should be taking her. I suggest the Peckham branch. Seating area there is pretty small & very easy to "accidentally" play a little footsie - wink wink...
2. KFC take away - Straight up, look at the damn deal on the token! Shout me if you want one...my card holder is filled to the brim with these bad boys.
You don't even need to eat in the KFC "restaurant" just take that fried pigeon home and eat it off her body...
3. McDonalds - Oxford street (the one near to Marks & Spencers/Muji) on route towards Tottenham Court Road. I'm telling you the lighting in the seating area down stairs will have your woman thinking she was in the Ritz hotel...very romantic. And them sweet chili chicken strip meal LORDAMERCY !
4. Keep it real and cook summit yourself - straight up if you ain't got no money or want to cut the time from food > > > to knocking between the sheets to 15mins. Stay at home and cook. I'm telling you these ready made sauces do the job.
Chopped up chicken + sauce + rice + a bottle of ribena tooth kind .
All for under a £5. Straight up lie you cooked that stuff yourself & she'll never know. I LIVE BY THIS ONE ! (those are all my jars. please note the chili one tastes like SH*T)
5. Wagamamas...you just cant go wrong with Wagamamas, I like to think of it as a MUCH better Nando's. Even though it ain't cooked by real Japanese people and they have some of the most scratched, mash up looking drinking glasses I've ever seen in my life. It still gets the pass...
6. Sketch - now we're going into big boys territory. Usually attended by the sort of men that wear Vivienne Westwood suits (vomit). But it has to be one of the slickest places I've ever been to in my life.
You're looking at £100+ for a "legit full" dinner on a normal night for two.
But I can guarantee you...if she's never been prior and you take her there for the first time, you're getting lucky that night son! Make sure she's dressed correct cos if not you and your lady will feel like a damn alien in that place.
7 Princess Gardens - your looking to spend about £40 each for both of you in this place. Pretty fancy but not as fancy as sketch. Located in Mayfair...good location and good food.
8. Les trous Garcons - the only one on the list I haven't eaten at. It was recommended by a friend, as you can see from the interior it looks pretty wild, I've been told the atmosphere is pretty cool but the food is expensive.
But f*ck it yeah, if that giraffe don't get you that thong on Monday night, I don't know what will.
8 Princi - if your not on eating no full meal Princi is the place for you. Get a quick pastry piece and a drink then keep it moving. To whereever your next location is...
Remember my friends stay safe, put something on the end of it and keep it real with your other half (unless your discussing your cooking)...
Now that's all done...someone make this connect between me and this Noami woman happen. I'm really looking to whisper saucy words in her ears, whilst feeding her "triple m burgers" from Morleys...
(holdtight deftronic on the gif)
Loving bntl like a fat kid loves cake.